Chiang Rai Tour – The Golden Triangle

In far northern reaches of Thailand lies the infamous Golden Triangle. Here, the Ruak River empties into the Mekong, and the borders of Laos, Myanmar and Thailand meet, forming the centrepiece of one of the world’s biggest opium producing regions. In fact, until the 21st century, more than half of the world’s heroin came from the Golden Triangle.

Our visit to the Golden Triangle did not involve opium smugglers, but it did involve a questionably seaworthy boat and a tizzy by yours truly.

Welcome to the Golden Triangle.
Welcome to the Golden Triangle.

Small boat, big boat.

Part of our visit to the Golden Triangle was a trip on the Mekong River across to Donsao, a Laotian island on the river. I was fully prepared for shallow bottom long boats which Patrick and I had been on during a trip to Krabi. I wasn’t very fond of them, but at least this time, I knew what I was in for. Or so I thought.

A similar boat to the first one we got in. This one was zipping along so fast that it was barely touching the water.
A similar boat to the first one we got in. This one was zipping along so fast that it was barely touching the water.

The boat we got in was not so much a shallow bottom long boat, but more of a surf board with a whippersnipper engine for a motor. I instantly hit the brakes. “I don’t really feel comfortable getting in that” I told Patrick. He said I could wait behind, although hesitated before getting in the boat himself. “No, if I don’t go I’ll regret it” I said, and climbed in. We set off and as we picked up speed, waves washed in over the low sides and all over poor John in the front of the boat.

John's view from the front of the boat. Poor bloke got a tad wet! [Photo by John McCormack]
John’s view from the front of the boat. Poor bloke got a tad wet! [Photo by John McCormack]
Big boats zipped by us and as we reached a particularly unsettling part of the river, the engine conked out. I wanted out, immediately. Yes, the river is shallow, but I cannot see the bottom and I don’t know what’s in it. I don’t care how shallow, deep, clear or dirty the water is, I want a bigger boat! We wheeled around and went back to shore for a bigger boat, thank goodness. Poor Ae was terribly apologetic, but I assured him I was okay and would be more comfortable with a bigger boat. We jumped into the boat I was expecting, a blue shallow bottom long boat, and headed off. Much better.

Me, looking much calmer in the blue boat. [Photo by John McCormack]
Me, looking much calmer in the blue boat. [Photo by John McCormack]
Our trip to Donsao was not a simple hop across the river. We zipped up to the point where all three borders met, in the middle of the Mekong. From there, we could see a large casino built on the Myanmar bank of the Mekong. Ae explained to us that one of the past generals of Myanmar had built it to help build business relationships with his buddies.

Casino on the banks of the Mekong in Myanmar.
Casino on the banks of the Mekong in Myanmar.

Welcome to Donsao, where you can buy anything!

I liked Donsao. I will get sneered at for saying that because “it’s not the real Laos”. Well, no it’s not. You don’t get a passport stamp when you arrive and you’re only allowed within a certain area. You pay a small fee of 30 baht per person once you arrive on the island, and are free to wander around the island’s market while your boat driver waits for you at the dock.

I quickly discovered Donsao was akin to my version of heaven. There were handbag vendors everywhere. Hundreds upon hundreds of handbags were laid out for display. Better quality knock offs than the ones you’ll find in Bangkok, these were the creme de la creme of knock of handbags. I, of course, had to buy three. Stop rolling your eyes. Nice, sturdy handbags that are big enough to carry all my stuff and don’t cost an arm and a leg are hard to come across. I took advantage of the situation, and Ae joked with me that I would sink the boat on the way back to Thailand.

Handbag heaven!
Handbag heaven!

You can buy nearly everything on Donsao. John and Pat picked up a Beer Lao each to accompany them on our walk, and I noticed a post box where you could post your Golden Triangle postcards so they would be Laos stamped. I bought three backpack patches (one for Laos, Thailand and Myanmar) and two scarves and Pat hunted through piles of t-shirts to find a different coloured Ralph Lauren polo than the other 29 he already owns. Ae picked a few carton of smokes and a few gifts for his wife and daughters.

One stall owner was intent on showing us her special wares; cobra and tiger whiskey. I kid you not. She also had bottles of scorpion whiskey for sale too. The cobra and tiger whiskeys were stored in enormous glass jars, and ladled out to game customers.

Tiger whiskey on the left, and cobra whiskey on the right. Guess what part of the tiger's anatomy is used in the whiskey...
Tiger whiskey on the left, and cobra whiskey on the right. Guess what part of the tiger’s anatomy is used in the whiskey…

212 House of Opium

After we sped back to Thailand, we popped into 212 House of Opium. This cramped and small museum was absolutely fascinating. It was packed with displays and information about the history of opium trading in the area, as well as opium use, cultivation, ancient opium pipes and weights, rituals and beliefs, and development of laws against opium. It’s 50 baht each, which gets your ticket – a lovely postcard. Attached to the museum is a great little gift shop selling locally made souvenirs.

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